The Korean Wedding Industry

Recently ,I attended my first Korean wedding, and it was quite the experience.  There are three basic styles of wedding in Korea.  First, there is a traditional Korean wedding.  However, they are no longer very common.  My co-teacher told me that his English teacher married a Korean, and they had a traditional wedding.  It was the first traditional Korean wedding many of the Korean guests had ever attended, and it was for a foreign groom!  Then there is a “western”/Christian-style wedding conducted in a church, which is also not very common.  And finally there is the most common style of wedding, which reflects Korea’s industrial rise of the past 50 years. 

Much of Korea’s modern traditions and culture can be traced back to the Korean War and its aftermath.  Since the nation was decimated by the war, as well as World War II, which also brought the end of Japanese colonial rule, the nation was practically starting from scratch.  After the wars, there were several false starts with corrupt officials and one fleeing president, but in 1961 General Park Chung-hee took power in a military coup and went on to lead the nation’s industrial revolution.  He was assassinated in 1979, and remains a controversial figure, but almost everyone gives him credit for the economic ‘Miracle on the Han,’ which transformed the nation into the industrial powerhouse that it is today.

So what does that have to do with weddings?  Well, the Koreans have imported many industries, from steel production to ship building.  In each industry, they mastered the systems and techniques from other nations and further refined them to become world leaders in each field.  And when it comes to weddings, they’ve done it again.  They took the western wedding, stripped away everything inefficient, added a staff to direct the production, and created a wedding industry.  And what industry could function without a factory?  Certainly not weddings, at least not in Korea, so they have built one-stop-shop wedding factories to further streamline the process. 

Like a typical factory worker, I carpooled to the wedding with some of my fellow teachers.  We clocked in at the basement-level car park before joining the large lines of fellow wedding attendees at a bank of elevators.  Heading for the sixth-floor wedding hall, we passed the first few floors dedicated to pre-wedding planning and shopping services: Sales and Counseling, Dress Shop, Make Up, Flowers, and even the Travel Agency to plan the honeymoon. 

- This wedding hall was on the second floor of the bus terminal in Suwon.  I guess it is the definition of efficiency.  Bus everyone in, second floor for your I do's, third floor for the buffet, and back to the first floor to bus home or on to the honeymoon.

 

We exited the elevators into a sea of attendees for two simultaneous weddings, because the wedding hall level is split into two halls to facilitate maximum output with double-barrel shotgun weddings.  In front of each hall, receiving tables were manned by the parents of the bride and groom.  Guests filed through and gave the customary envelope of cash rather than gifts. 

An interesting note, gifts are actually considered less personal than a gift of cash by some Koreans.  Also, the amount of gift money is pretty formalized.  Depending on your relationship to the couple, you are expected to give between $30 and $100, using crisp new bills in a simple white envelope.  This system makes sense when you consider the cost of the average wedding is $50,000.  However, I initially thought the cash was for the bride and groom, but it turns out it's actually for the parents - a little thank you for raising these two crazy kids.

Also, due to this formal monetary gift culture, and the expectation that you attend the weddings of your co-workers' children, there is also an expectation that children should marry before their parents retire, so that the family/parents get a ‘return on previous investments’ for all the other weddings they attended for co-workers.  This was true in my co-teacher's case. Her father decided to retire early, so her wedding date had to be moved up as well.

This may have been awkward if the groom had not already proposed.  But in Korea, couples typically don’t have a formal proposal before wedding planning begins.  Instead, they simply move directly into wedding planning.  I guess the rejection is not as bad if she is only saying no to planning a wedding, rather than the question, ‘Will you marry me?’ 

Back at the factory, attendees exchanged their gift envelope for a buffet reception coupon.  Again, to maximize efficiency, the reception was held on the next floor, rather than some banquet hall across town.  Plus, some guests didn’t even waste time with the ceremony, but headed directly for the buffet. 

I wanted to experience the entire assembly-line tour, so I was escorted to the photography studio where the bride was taking pre-ceremony portraits.  I peaked in to say hello and was quickly directed in, posed next to her, flash, flash, and escorted on to the wedding hall. 

Pre-ceremony photo session.

 

The hall looked like a typical a banquet room divided by a raised, catwalk-style aisle with round tables on each side for the bride and grooms parties.  A montage of wedding photos played on two wall screens as people took their seats.  The master of ceremonies announced the wedding would begin in five minutes.  The ceremony began with the arrival of the couple’s parents.  They were posed for pictures as they conducted traditional candle lighting ceremonies and were quickly escorted to their seats by a group of wedding choreographers. 

Next, the bride arrived in typical fashion, before the groom rapidly marched down the aisle to her side.  Rather than a priest, the ceremony is conducted by a respected elder, selected by the groom.  It is often a superior from work, or in this case, one of the groom’s university professors.  As he began his speech, the team of photographers and choreographers swarmed around the bride and groom, fluffing the wedding gown, straightening jackets and snapping away paparazzi style.

Suddenly, the couple was turned, a cake wheeled out, candle lit and blown out, sword presented, cake cut, and wheeled away again.  The couple then turned to the audience and was surrounded by the bride’s friends in matching outfits for a choreographed dance performance.  Next, the microphone was handed to the groom to sing a love ballad, followed by ceremonial bows to each set of parents, and just like that, they were married and marching down the aisle.  Newlyweds in 30 minutes or less.  The choreographers fired confetti poppers over their heads, and began sweeping it up before the last streamers had even hit the ground. 

A few bouquets were moved and they changed gears to wedding group photos.  Family shots, flash; bridal party, flash; grooms party, flash; bouquet tossed, flash; and we were out the door.  As we headed for the reception, we passed the first wave of diners lumbering down the stairs with full bellies and toothpicks in hand.  The buffet was packed with people from both of the weddings, and I quickly realized why some people opted to skip the actual ceremony.  It was crowded, but the food was excellent.

Meanwhile, the bride and groom took a detour to change into traditional Hanbok attire, and possibly had a small traditional ceremony with their parents, before arriving at the buffet to say hello and thank you to everyone who attended, or at least anyone who had not already done a dine and dash.

And that was it, my first Korean wedding was a wrap.  We hopped back in the car, clocked out of the parking garage and started our commute, the longest part the day.